Something to live for
by blare
Summary: After her fight with Miranda, Shepard beats some sense into Jack. T for language and implied suggestive content. Jack/Miranda


**A/N:** This story was a product of my thinking that Jack and Miranda's fight after their loyalty missions never seemed to end on a good note, so why not make what happens after end well? I tried, but I don't seem to be that good at writing Miranda, so sorry if she's OOC.

**Disclaimer:** The Mass Effect series and its' characters are owned by EA and Bioware. I only claim ownership to this story.

**Something to Live For**

The area underneath engineering was a small, mostly dark area, lit by only two small lights. Due to this, and the fact that most people didn't bother to go down there, the crew of the Normandy had dubbed it the Hideaway. It was exactly because of these reasons that Jack decided to make that area into her quarters. It would have been the perfect place to stay, too, if that damn Commander didn't know exactly where to look every time she was looking to talk to her.

The ex-convict had thought about moving where she slept every so often, making everybody keep on their toes in order to avoid her, but knew it wouldn't matter if Shepard was looking for her. That damn woman was persistent as hell and everybody sure as fuck knew about it. She guessed that was a bit of why she could respect the red-haired woman a bit, not that she would ever admit it. If only she would keep to her own damn business instead of sticking her nose into everyone else's. Then again, she wasn't the only one who tried to butt in to other people's lives. As much as she didn't want the biotic on the ship, that Cerberus bitch sure seemed to be interested in her life.

Before she could continue on that line of thought, the sound of one of the doors above opening caught her attention. The soft taps of boots on the stairs could have been anybody, but the bald woman knew better than to think it was anybody but Shepard. Only two people were stupid enough to come down there and one of them was pissed off at her.

When the red-haired Commander had finally descended the stairs, the ex-con looked into her green eyes and smirked. "Shepard," she greeted. "Come to try making me play nice with the cheerleader again?" Jack barked out a short laugh. No matter how hard she tried, the biotic knew she would never like anyone allied with Cerberus. Didn't mean she wouldn't fuck that "perfect" bitches brains out.

As much as she hated the woman, Jack had to admit that Miranda Lawson was a damn nice sight. From the shape of her face, to the way she moved, to the way her suit hugged her curves, it was like she was just made to get people hot and bothered. This, and their intense hate of each other, made it more surprising that the blue-eyed Cerberus bitch actually called her out for a rough after-mission fuck a while back. She apparently liked it because, every week since, Miranda came down to the Hideaway for another round. Avoid each other most of the week, then screw their troubles away on that last day.

It was a nice enough arrangement between them, but then that woman decided to start talking to her after. About her family, about her past, she would just start talking. What made it worse was that the woman would always find some way to get Jack talking too. Usually the conversation would reach Cerberus and she would walk out, ending the conversation there. Today was different, though.

Today she had blown the Teltin facility to hell. She had gone in and destroyed the place that tormented her nightmares for so long. She felt so good after that she decided to move up her next time with Miranda. When the subject of Cerberus was brought up she stayed. What a stupid mistake.

The bitch refused to admit Cerberus did any of it. She refused Jacks entire past and what she went through. She refused Jack. And she was not happy about it.

Now wasn't the time to start getting lost in memories, though, not with the Commander standing over her. Shaking her head clear of her thoughts on the woman, Jack looked up to see Eileen Shepard was just looking at her. There was no reaction at all to the question, and that was all it took to set Jack on the edge of her cot. If there was one thing the bald woman learned on this ship, it was that the former Spectre always had a reaction to anything. Always.

"Come with me." The words shot out of the Commanders mouth in an even tone that the biotic had never heard before. It was almost like the woman standing before her was empty, only a shell of what she was. The tattooed woman almost had to follow her, just to find out what could make Shepard change so drastically from the sarcastic saint that she tried to be.

Standing from her cot, Jack followed the Commander into the cargo hold that Grunt had taken as his. Jack had gotten along pretty easily with the Krogan, seeing as how they both seemed to like smashing their enemies until they were paste. Sure, their tolerance of each other sometimes ended up in competition, but that was just how they liked it. Nothing like a Krogan to keep a bet interesting.

Shepard didn't stop in the hold, however. Passing by Grunt with a slight nod, she opened a latch on the floor to reveal a ladder to the launching bay. As the Commander climbed down, Jack looked over to Grunt, wondering if he knew why the woman was acting strangely. With only a shake of the head as a reply, the bald woman shrugged her shoulders before following down the ladder.

As soon as she set foot on the launch bay's floor, she looked around the room. The bay wasn't much to see, just the Kodiak sitting in its' clamps and a large amount of crates covering the deck. The Commander stood in the middle of the room, her back turned to Jack as she worked at something in her hands.

Jack slowly walked toward the woman, wondering why she brought her to the mostly empty room. If she had wanted to talk to her, the Hideaway was usually secluded enough for the both of them. "Alright, Shepard, we took the long way to the ass end of the ship. Now would you mind telling me why you dragged me down-"

The biotics words were cut off suddenly by a sudden pain in her jaw, forcing her to dip her head and take a step back. When she looked back up, Shepard was pulling her fist back, adopting a fighting stance.

"What the hell?!"Jack yelled out as her Commander threw another punch. Seeing the attack coming this time, the biotic threw up a barrier, the blue field stopping the fist from making an impact against her stomach. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

In an instant, another fist was flying at her head, this one covered in its' own blue biotic field. As soon as the fields connected they both broke, leaving Jack defenseless against the fist, forcing her back a step. As soon as the bald woman recovered, and was about to attack back, Eileen spoke.

"I have something I need to tell you about." The cold tone was so unlike the Commander that it stopped Jack for a second. As the words sunk in, a raging fury ran straight to the ex-convicts head.

"Then why the fuck are you attacking me," she spat. Almost instantly, the bald woman was forced to double over, her only support being Shepards' arm where her fist impacted with her stomach. How the Commander had suddenly become so fast, Jack had no idea, but she wished she had at least grabbed the Carnifex pistol that the Salarian had given her.

"We're fighting because it seems to be the only way to get the lesson through to you." The Commander moved away from her, forcing her to take a step forward to keep from falling. No matter what, she wouldn't allow herself to fall inside the ship. She would hear no end to the Cerberus bitch's taunting if she fell.

"Jack," Eileen paused. Jack knew she always thought about what to say next when it came to the convict. "What do you plan to do after we destroy the Collectors?"

The question took the bald woman by surprise as Miranda's voice flashed through her mind, asking that same question. Damn that woman and her questions. "Can't say I put any thought into it," She lied as she threw a biotic field covered punch at the woman.

"C'mon Jack," the red-head replied as she side stepped the woman's punches, "Everybody has some plans for when all this is over, though most are just planning on heading back to see their loved ones. Hell, even I have someone waiting for me on the other side. What do you have waiting for when you're finished?"

Miranda's face flashed through her mind, and she instantly tried to squash the thought as her heart sped up. Now was not the time to be thinking about a meaningless fling, not with the Commander wearing her down. "You wanna know? Fine. When all this is over, I plan on hunting down Cerberus' dogs and killing them one by one. Happy?"

"And after that?" This question made Jack pause and blink for a moment. She had never thought about what she would do after she got her revenge. The ex-convict would probably just find something else to let her anger out on. She looked up to say so to the Commander, until she saw the look on her face.

The smile Shepard returned her was almost painful to look at. It was one of those smiles she turned toward that Turrian when he talked about that crew he had. It was a look of pity that Jack didn't need, and it made her biotics flare up so hard that she could probably crush the ship if she wanted too.

Instead of forcing everybody in the ship into a slow death, however, she decided to just try and crush the Commander. Focusing her power, she shot a pulse of her biotics forward to grab the infuriating woman. She had almost had her, too, when a thin Biotic field covered the red-haired woman and she disappeared.

The biotic looked around, trying to find where the woman went, when she heard a gunshot ring out. Faster than she could raise a barrier, a piercing pain shot through her leg, forcing her to her knee. The tattooed woman's hand ran to the pain, pressing gently against where she was hit.

"You fucking shot me!"

"Calm down," the Commander called from behind her.

Calm down? After Shepard shot her? Fuck that! "Like hell I'm gonna calm down! You just fucking shot me!"

"I said. Calm. Down." The voice came from right behind her as she felt the Commander grab her arm that was holding on to her leg. She tried to pull her arm free, but Shepard's grip held firm as she pulled Jacks hand in front of her face. The Spectre held it there, waiting for the convict to stop struggling and actually look at the limb in front of her. The first thing the biotic noticed was that her hand wasn't covered in red like she expected. It was covered in yellow.

"I shot you with paint ammunition. It won't break the skin so easily, but it hurts like hell when it makes its' mark. We used to use these all the time back when I ran with the 10th street Reds."

Shepard's words quickly caused Jacks eyebrow to quirk. She let out a small cackle as all the tension instantly left her body. Realizing you weren't going to have to dig a slug out of your leg, or lose the limb entirely, apparently took a lot out of you. "You were a gang member? That's a hard one to believe."

"Harder to believe is that I wouldn't be here if it weren't for them." The Commander said as she walked around from behind her. After a few steps, the woman turned to look at Jack before sitting down. "Every tactic I've used in the service has been inspired at some point by when I was with the Reds."

"I met someone in the Reds before," Jack shot back. "They weren't anything close to you. Especially didn't fight like you did just now."

Eileen shook her head with a smirk playing on her lips. "The groups changed since I was a member. Turned into xenophobic idiots after getting too much power. I wouldn't be surprised if Cerberus goes knocking on their door sometime soon."

"Still doesn't explain how you just dropped me like that." Jack tried to act indifferent, but a spark in her eyes betrayed her. Nobody beat her, especially as easy as Shepard just did.

"Much as I like to keep it quiet, Joker and I have one thing in common. We were at the top of the fields we chose. He was the best in his flight school, and I kicked ass in close combat." The Commander chuckled a bit as she turned her head to the ceiling, "Though I guess having some biotics helped me in that area."

"No shit, girl-scout," Jack bit back. As good as the information on why she could do it was, it still didn't tell her how the woman had just made her feel like she had ran a planet's surface in ten minutes. It made her angry to think that the soldier wasn't going to tell her how she did it, either. "So, are you going to tell me why you brought me here, or are you just going to let me get back up to kick your ass."

"You're pretty strong, Jack. The most powerful biotic I've ever met, but I'll beat you every time you get up. I learned long ago that it doesn't matter how strong you are if you can't use it properly." Shepard paused for a moment as they stared each other in the eyes. Jack could almost see the dulling in her eyes as the former Spectre started again. "Have I ever told you about the first time I used my biotics?"

"Do I really look like someone who likes a trip down 'memory lane'?" Jack questioned. First Miranda wanted to tell her about her Daddy issues, and now Shepard was telling old stories? Next thing she'll know, the Drell on the crew deck would want to tell her all about the Hanar ass he's kissed.

"No, but I'm not really giving you a choice here. Now shut up and listen or I'll cover you in paint rounds." Knowing that Shepard wasn't kidding, Jack laid back, supporting her body with her arms, waiting for the red-head to continue.

"Back when I was in the Reds, I used to carry my own crew around. Four friends that would follow me around and another Red member we would keep around to scare whoever we ran into. Adam, if I remember right. Looking back, he kind of reminds me of you."

"Yeah? And how's that?" Jack didn't bother even trying to hide her smirk, the Commander being too far in thought to notice it anyways. It would have been the perfect time to attack, had the ex-con actually wanted to. Despite her protest earlier, she was interested in what could have made the woman in front of her into what she was. Even going through Cerberus' files, she could only find the bare minimum on the soldiers' background.

"He didn't care for anybody except himself. If anybody got in the way of what he wanted, even one of my friends, he would attack them. Dangerous as he was, he still helped us, so we stayed out of his way and he kept everybody else away. At least until something happened."

Shepard paused to look at the biotic, noticing she had the woman's full attention. "For years, Adam was living from one pleasure to the next, and everybody turned blind and deaf to it. Everybody except me. Every man he killed and every girl he raped, I heard it, and it killed me a little more every time. He was the worst of scum down there, and I decided to make him stop."

"Yeah, and how did he take that," Jack growled out as she rubbed her leg. The pain from before had faded fast, but it still stung as her adrenalin started running low.

"He decided I was a good enough target to vent on. At the time, the fight was pretty tough. He was stronger than I was, but I was faster. The only problem was that I didn't know how to fight as well as I do now. It left me at a disadvantage that he easily took up."

"Eventually, he caught me and started trying to molest me. I was weak then, trying to hit him anywhere I could to make him stop, but it was useless. I had my moment, though, when he tried to take off his pants."

Eileen jabbed a fist in front of her, as though punching at an invisible target, "I put all the strength I could into a punch at his face. I wanted to hit him so hard it would put him through the wall behind him. I didn't realize that I had hit him with biotics until that wall fell in on him."

Wide-eyed, Jack laughed at the thought of Shepard punching some idiot through a brick wall without any implants to increase her biotics. The only thing crazier than the thought was that the ex-con actually believed she did it. The Commander made her carrier out of doing impossible things, who's to say that she didn't make a life of it before becoming a Spectre. "So what happened to the guy?"

"He lived." Eileen noted the visible shock on Jack's face before she continued, "The people inside the building called an ambulance that dragged him to the hospital in time to save him. He isn't able to walk anymore, though. Being knocked through a wall severed his spine in his lower back. He no longer has any feeling below his waist."

Hearing that only made Jack laugh more. As much as she hated people, and as much as she liked sex, she could never even think about raping someone. Even a Cerberus lapdog like Miranda deserved better than to be used like that. "Sounds like he got what he deserved."

"Yeah, but it left my friends vulnerable. While I was getting rid of Adam, some other gangs decided to take that time to attack my friends. I lost them all that day. They either died, or hated me for getting rid of the person who kept them safe. I quit the Reds soon after and ran straight to the Alliance recruiting office."

Jack was silent for a moment, letting Shepard sit in her memories. When she realized the Commander was finished with her story, she spoke up. "Is that all?"

Shepard nodded, keeping a close eye on Jack as she sat forward to talk. "You know, if you were just going to talk about your gang days, we could have skipped the fighting and stayed in the Hideaway. Woulda been a lot more comfortable and less painful."

Keeping a close eye on her, Jack watched as the Commander stood and offered her hand to help the biotic up. The tattooed woman waited for a minute before grabbing the hand and was pulled up. As soon as she was on her feet, pain exploded in her jaw once more as Shepard punched her again.

"What the fu-"

"Were you listening at all to what I was telling you?" Shepards voice was much louder than the biotics, practically deafening her own yell. Not knowing what else to do, Jack decided to yell back at the woman.

"I guess I fucking wasn't, so what the hell do you want from me?" Shepard punched at her again, but Jack was ready this time, dodging while grabbing the Commander by her wrist.

"I want you to get your damn act together, and for you to stop being so goddamn stupid." As the red-head yelled this, a biotic blast shot through her hand, shooting the biotic back toward a pile of crates. Jack lifted a barrier around herself as soon as she could, cutting down the impact against the crate.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Jack rasped out, using the crate behind her to help her stand more quickly. Despite the barrier protecting her, she still hit the metal box harder than she would have liked to, knocking the wind out of her. When the ex-con looked up, Shepard had rushed herself to be right in front of her, grabbing at one of the straps she used to keep her chest covered.

"I'm talking about you having a gift that you had to fight for, and using it for something as petty as revenge." Shepard practically roared into her face. "I'm talking about you living like Adam did, going from one kill to the next."

Now that was it. Shepard could kick her ass, and the convict would be fine with it, but she wouldn't let the red-head get away with judging her. Soon after the words left Eileen's mouth, Jack's fist was up, throwing a punch at the woman. The Commander pulled back an instant before the fist came into contact, leaving her punching into thin air.

Suddenly, the tattooed woman felt the familiar sensation of weightlessness as her feet were swept out from underneath her. All too soon, her body was met with the cold metal of the bay's floor. Stunned for a moment, Jack barely even felt when the Commander planted herself on her back, pulling the bald woman's arm behind her.

"I'm talking about being on a ship where you could actually trust some people, but deciding to hate them for no goddamn reason. That is what I'm talking about."

Jack tried to struggle out from under Shepard, but it was a losing battle. The biotic knew it was hopeless, but she couldn't stop from struggling. No matter what, she could never give in.

"Jack."

The sudden softness to the Commanders voice made the convict stop, her mind flashing back to the raven-haired woman a few decks above again. She shook her head clear of the image before looking back through the corner of her eye and responding with a tired, "What?"

She could see the trace of a smile on Shepard's face as she stood, getting off of the tattooed woman. The red-head stepped in front of Jack's head before kneeling down, knowing the biotic was watching her. Despite the weight being removed from her back, Jack couldn't seem to move more than her head. It was as though her limbs were made of lead.

"You are a good person, Jack. You may be arrogant and rude, but I know you're a good person. That's why I hate it when I see that reminder of the Reds in you."

"I've had to kill too many people because they had nothing more than killing to live for, and I've seen too many people die because they wanted to be by themselves. I want you to find something to live for, Jack." Jack opened her mouth, ready to shoot off some curses at the woman, when she felt Shepard's hand rest on her head. Looking up, the biotic was struck speechless to find that the Commander had tears trailing down her face. She had never seen Shepard cry before, even after that Asari that she liked gave her the cold shoulder.

"I don't want to have to kill another member of my crew."

Darkness was starting to surround Jack's vision as Eileen stood and walked out of her sight. The sound of the elevator door opening and closing barely registered with her, her mind now focused on trying to stay awake. Not a fan of passing out where anybody could find her, the biotic slowly tried to stand, but was only able to rise up to her knees before her body decided to give out on her, forcing her to the ground again.

The tattooed woman continued trying, and failing, to get to her feet until she had only a shred of consciousness left. When the elevator door opened, Jack couldn't even muster up the energy to look to see who was seeing her in such a sad state. The soft tapping of heels on the metal floor told her that the person was coming closer, making the ex-con tense up. She knew what people did when you couldn't stop them.

Her thoughts fell away as a pair of arms were wrapped around her, rubbing her arm lightly. The calming movements seemed to work as she visibly relaxed. However, with her tension, the last of her energy left her, causing her to black out.

When Jack regained consciousness the next day she noticed that what she was laying on was too soft to be the floor of the launch bay and too wide to be her cot. While she appreciated the bed, going to sleep in one place and waking up in another was never a good sign. Despite her bodies protesting soreness, the biotic sat up and looked around the room, looking for who she would need to kill before Shepard for taking advantage of her blacking out.

Her eyes crossed the room before stopping at the back of the raven-haired Miranda Lawson sitting at a desk. The ex-con immediately relaxed at the sight, knowing exactly where she was. It helped that she knew that the woman in front of her wouldn't do anything to her without asking first.

"I'll be with you in a moment, Jack," the woman called back to her, "I just need to finish this."

Jack sat there and watched Miranda as she worked, typing away at another report that she'll be sending to the Illusive Man. At times she wondered what the loyalist woman said about her in those reports. Try as she might, though, Cerberus' cheerleader was good at keeping the biotic out.

It wasn't long before Miranda turned her holo-board off and turned to look at Jack. Staring into those blue eyes, the biotics heart certainly didn't speed up. Just like how her heart definitely didn't break as she remembered their fight the day before.

As the convict tried to regain the control she seemed to have lost in the last day, Miranda decided to break the silence between them. "You're probably wondering why you're in my bed after our fight yesterday."

Barely comprehending the words as she fought to keep her emotions in check, Jack gave a short snort. "May have crossed my mind."

Miranda smirked as she stood from her seat and walked over to lean against the window. "I received a visit from the Commander last night after your fight. She didn't tell me what happened, but she told me that you were on the Launch deck and that you needed a bit of help getting to bed."

"That doesn't explain why I'm in _your_ bed."

Miranda had the smile of a predator that had just trapped her prey as she walked closer to her prey. "You're in my bed because you passed out and I wanted to have a talk with you when you woke up."

"Well, I'm awake now and it sounds like we're talking to me." Jack gave a short jerk of her head, motioning for Miranda to come closer to her. When the woman sat near her legs, the convict continued, "So get to the point already."

The Cerberus loyalist nodded, a strand of black hair falling in front of her face before being neatly tucked away again. She opened her mouth, as though about to say something, but quickly shut it and looked at where her hands rested in her lap. As surprising as it was seeing Miranda unsure of what to say, Jack was getting tired of surprises and getting impatient with the woman.

"Will you just spit it out?" The tattooed woman almost yelled, breaking the woman out of her thoughts.

"Right then." Miranda pulled herself back together quickly as she looked from her lap back to the biotic laying in her bed. "I wanted to say... I'm sorry."

Right then, all of Jack's thoughts stopped and Miranda looked away again. The convict could deal with anger easily enough but apologies were a completely different story. She was clueless on how to deal with someone apologizing to her. So, the bald woman sat there staring at the raven-haired beauty, who took her silence as a cue to continue.

"Yesterday, I said some things I shouldn't have and I worded some things wrong. What I wanted to say was that it was a mistake what they did to you. I never meant to say that you were a mistake."

Jack watched as Miranda looked back to her, her eyes watering up with the beginnings of tears. Completely out of her element, Jack's mouth opened and closed without words. The Cerberus woman leaned closer to the biotic, her face a few inches away, and placed a hand on her sheet covered leg when she asked, "Can you forgive me?"

Almost automatically, Jack leaned forward and kissed the woman, a jolt running through her body at the contact. As bad as she was at situations like this, the convict figured this was the right thing to do. She was proven right as Miranda returned the affection.

At what felt like too soon, the raven-haired woman pulled away from the biotic. Pulling the bald-girl into an embrace, Miranda softly spoke into her ear, "Thank you." The two words seemed to be enough to force Jack's heart fast enough that she could hear it's beats.

Jack quickly calmed herself down before pulling away from the woman before her. Thinking about the other day, the tattooed woman seemed to remember something important. A smirk placed itself on her face as she addressed the woman in front of her.

"You know, I never did get to have fun yesterday."

* * *

In the Main Battery, Shepard and four other members of the Normandy's crew sat around a card table playing Skyllian Five when a light banging noise could be heard from one side of the room.

"Told you it was a lover's quarrel. Now, pay up." Shepard said with a smirk as she looked over her cards.

"It shouldn't count, you helped settle it." Garrus complained as he pulled a few credits from a pocket on the inside of his armor.

"That's right, of course they'd get together if you helped." Donnelly said as he pulled out his own credits, Daniels agreeing with him as she did the same.

"All I did was put them in the same room together, they did the rest." Eileen said as she took the credits from her crew members.

"I am interested to know what you were doing with Jack on the docking bay, though." Thane said as he looked at Shepard. "Also, raise ten."

"Kind of a risky move against Garrus there, Thane. He's never really had a poker face, even after the gunship shot him, and it's saying he's got something good." Shepard said as she watched Garrus' mandibles move back and forth. "As for Jack, I just decided to beat some sense into her. Raise five."

* * *

Jack laid on Miranda's bed, the woman curled up next to her and resting on her arm. Apparently, the cheerleader had been awake all night, waiting for the biotic to wake up to apologize. As she lay there, her other arm found its' way around the other woman's waist.

In her sleep, Miranda moved closer into the biotics warm embrace, a small smile gracing her lips. As a smirk played on Jack's lips, some of Shepard's last words ran through her mind. Holding the raven-haired woman close, the convict thought to herself.

"Looks like I do have more to live for."


End file.
